But anyway, had another haircut. Hmm, not feeling so psyched about it anymore now that I've grown into it :P Oh it's short. The shortest I've had. And the punkiest. (for me, for the history of my hairstyles, it is punky) How do I define punky? I spike it with clay.
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I'm bored and very free in the office. The boss is out and was supposed to come in in the morning tapi ntah pegi mane dah. Apparently his holiday would officially start this afternoon after seeing a client in the morning which he has scheduled since last week that's why we rushed those images for him yesterday and today tapi takde berita ttg apa2 pun. One whole day bayang pun tak nampak. Dahlah I wasn't feeling well yesterday I came in half day lagi just to render one more image for him. Ish. And everyone thought I was on MC for one day when I specifically called in and say 'half-day'. When I asked the boss "You want me to do anything?" He shook his head in reply and said "No..." =.=' Nvm. I sungguh rajin and love to come to work.
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For all my life, I've attracted quite a number of attention, both wanted and unwanted. I've lived through mockery and teasing since childhood about my skin colour difference and looks, and how I won't get a man, what more a man of my dreams. (Fuck you insensitive slimeball don't think you're all that good looking yourself hope you have a small d*) Thanks to all these people my self-esteem is usually near level zero. At good times, one.
There were times I'd tell myself to ignore these people cos they do not know me and God has a better plan for me. There were times I'd go attract some attention intentionally but there were also times when I won't need to. Those times of course, were flattering. But usually, these are the times when people of a darker shade would approach me. Not just once, twice but every freaking time ok! Do you know how irritating that is? Not that I'm being a racist but at this stage it sorta 'proves' all the teasing right and it's not helping me la. Gimme a break man stop playing games with me what is this trying to show? Among the thorns there's a rose? Because ironically, I've only dated fairer skinned guys so far? (Not that I purposely choose them but I happen to click with them ok and that's very important) I really don't understand.
***It's quite unacceptable to me how one is not fluent in any language at all. You learn at least 2 languages in school, if not three. Nevermind if you're not so good in BM cos it doesn't really matter anyway. (But I'd prefer people who are good in BM cos the tongue twisting of the accent is quite the sexy but not in Tamil ><) Even if you're not good in English, nevermind. Cos I'd assume you were Chinese educated and at least you know how to read and write your own language unlike me. But you come telling me you don't know Chinese either. 0_o Cannot la like that.
I'm not asking you to be very masterful in one language la. But just to be able to convey a message verbally and even writing it in the proper manner. I'm generally talking about people (that I have come across) who always shove the responsibility of writing and speaking in a language that they think they're not good at to people whom they think they are. If so, when will be their turn to be responsible? You have your friends to help you now, but when you need to live on your own, who do have? No one. But yourself. You go to a foreign land where the people there do not speak your language, how do you communicate? Miscommunication comes in. Misunderstanding. You don't socialise with them because everyone do not speak your language, who's at a disadvantage?
Gosh, PMS la. And no, I won't want my kids to be in that position (and I'm quite sure they won't la)
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